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How to Figure Out if Your Anxiety is Normal or Not

No matter who you are or even how confident of a person you might be, there has been and will be a time where you will feel some sort of anxiety in your life. Whether it's just a case of the nervous jitters over a speech you might have to make or that panic you feel before you have to take a test. Anxiety is simply a normal human emotion. Some people though, can suffer from what is called an anxiety disorder and this can cause problems in their lives. When a person has abnormal anxiety it can begin to interfere with their daily lives and can even make them to try and avoid certain things that seem to upset them or make them nervous. There is a way in which you can figure out whether or not your anxiety is normal or abnormal.

One of the most important things you need to do is to try and do is to identify when you are feeling anxious and why you are feeling this way. You should start keeping a journal so you can jot down all the times you start feeling nervous and what triggered it.

You might want to also try some lifestyle changes to see if this might help you with your anxiety. You should try and get rid of any kind of stress that seems to be completely unnecessary in your life and then take some time to just relax or go hand out with friends. Make sure that your diet is healthy and start doing some sort of exercising if you aren't already doing this. If you start doing these simple things you will want to see if the anxiety lessens. If you are experiencing normal anxiety, these kind of changes should help to make it go away. However, if the anxiety is abnormal none of these changes may help and you may get anxious for no definable reason.

While you journal your anxiety you should also begin rating it and how much it might be interfering with your life. Take note to see if you are trying to avoid certain places you use to love to go to, or if you stopped doing things you always use to enjoy to do because now it makes you too nervous. All of this could mean that you have abnormal anxiety.

In your journal you should also indicate any physical things that might show up when you become anxious as well. If you notice lots of muscle tension, stress, bad headaches as well as insomnia then this too could be indicators that you are experiencing abnormal anxiety.

You can also go online and take tests that will help you to identify the many different symptoms there are with regards to anxiety disorder. This is not meant to be a self diagnoses just a way in which you can better understand the situation and then take this information to your doctor.

After you have done all of this and you suspect that your anxiety might be abnormal it's then a good idea to either go see your personal doctor or try to get in to see a counselor so you can talk about the anxiety that you are experiencing.


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Helping Children Cope With Stress

Just like adults, children experience stress in their lives as well. But, stress for children can be far more frightening than it can be for most adults. So, it is important for caregivers and parents to be able to identify when children are getting stressed out and learn how to help the child manage their own stress. Below are a few pointers that might help guide you in the right direction with this situation.

Understand that even toddlers can be stressed out by having to meet new people in the home or perhaps going to a day care center and this is because there has been a break in the normal family routine that a toddler has become accustomed to. Also, older children have to deal with stress brought on by peers, the expectations of their teachers and their parents and all of this needs to be taken into consideration. So as parents it's important that you do your best to serve as a positive model when it comes to managing stress. If you have trouble handling it, there is no doubt that your children will too. So it's important if you learn to manage yours so that they can learn from how you handle your personal stress.

It's really important to remember that you do not want to solve every single problem that your children have. You need to be able to allow your children their own opportunity to learn how to work through their problems so that they will understand the value of problem solving on their own. It is not going to help your child at all if you try to fix everything for them. So it is sometimes a good idea to not even try to offer them any advice. Sometimes if you just listen to what is bothering them might be just all that they need to relieve them from the stress that's bothering them.

As said before, don't try to give advice, especially don't be the type of person that is always giving advice for every little thing that might come up. Just listen to your children and let them vent. Venting can be a good source of release when a child is dealing with stress. So, it is important that they feel that they can come to you to talk about problems without feeling like you are going to interrupt or try to fix it for them.

Make sure that you do however, ask your children the types of questions that are going to encourage them to think about the problem on their own without your help. Ask them what they think the next step might be in how to handle the situation that they might be facing.

You also should consider teaching your children that it is important to learn how to take deep breathes when they feel stressed. Deep breathing is a wonderful way of relieving stress for anyone. Another good thing to have them do when they are stressed out is to listen to some nice, calm and soothing music.

You should also think about the different things that you find helpful to relieve your own stress and if these are things that you think that your children could do with ease, then go a head and show them what you do and pass it onto them. You could have them take the dog for a walk, suggest they go out and shoot a few hoops or ride their bike, some sort of exercise that will take their mind off of the stress. All these things can work workers on relieving the stress a child is feeling, even adults.


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How To Help Your Child Overcome Anxiety Over Test Taking

It may not be the end of the world to have to take a test, it still may be to some children one of their greatest fears and may cause them a lot of anxiety. Some kids get so anxious about taking a test that they can often start exhibiting physical ailments due to the anxiety. Some want to cry, some want to run out of the room and others may actually get physically sick. There are some things that you can do that might help to lessen the anxiety of taking tests.

Understand that for some children learning something comes a lot easier than it does for others and you need to let your child know that even though an “A” is a nice thing to shoot for, it's the effort they put out that is the most important. After all there are some kids that barely have to turn a page in a book and they still get an “A” while others will study all week and they barely make a “B”. So praise your child for all the time and effort they are putting into their studies. You should also encourage them and give them rewards when you know that they are truly doing their best. Make sure that they want to try and earn an “A” for their own personal reasons and not yours.

Make sure that you try and prepare them for their tests on a daily basis. Make sure that they hand in all of their completed homework assignments. Because if you child keeps up with all of their daily school work they are going to be able to absorb more than they would if they waited until the very last minute to try and cram everything in.

You also should give them some practice tests at home. You should try and give them at least one test a week on their different subjects that they are studying. Sit them down at a table in a comfortable chair and turn off the TV, don't allow any phone calls and then have them take your test. While they are taking your practice test teach them how to remain calm, especially if they are getting frustrated. Make sure to praise them when they are able to remain calm and finish the test. With each test the confidence level of your child is going to increase.

If your child has negative thoughts about test taking you need to gently help them to change those negative thoughts and try to find more positive ones for them to concentrate on. Try to convince them that the more tests that they take the better they are going to get at them. Have them remind themselves that the more they study the better they get at taking tests. This can actually help to lower their anxiety come test day.

You might also want to teach your child to do some deep breathing. Deep breathing for anyone is calming and this can calm your child down. Teach them how to take deep breaths so they can practice doing this before they take their test. This will lower their anxiety immensely and probably without them even realizing it. Make sure to practice the deep breathing with them at home so they are sure that they know how to do it on their own when at school.

Teach them how to mentally see being calm while they are testing. Make them close their eyes and then tell them to imagine that they are at their desk taking a test. Then tell them to try to see themselves as being totally calm and confident with themselves. Gently walk them through this when their eyes are still closed. Tell them something like “You read your first question and you know the answer.” “You read your second question and you know the answer.” “You are totally relaxed.” Continue doing this quite often at home and you might be able to get your child to do this quite easily on their own.

Make sure that the night before the test they get plenty of sleep and when they get up in the morning make sure that you give them a nice healthy breakfast and make sure that they get off and running to school on time. Being too tired, still hungry and not getting to school on time are three things that are going to throw them off and they may not be able to do well on their tests. Make sure everything is calm the morning of their test and that they have everything need packed in their backpack. This is something that should be done the evening prior.

Final Note: Whatever you do, don't ignore this problem and think that it's simply going to go away on it's on, because it more than likely won't. So address it head on and take care of it before it gets worse. One bad testing experience will turn into two and so on.


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How to Cope With the Stress of a Hateful Teen

Raising kids of any age is a challenge but anyone who has or is raising a teen knows that this is the toughest age group of them all, even under the best conditions. It is nearly impossible for a parent to try and navigate around all of the hormonal fluctuations, all the friends, the new experiences all the freedoms they demand and so on. It's even harder when your teen openly lets you know that they hate you and it is one of the most painful things for a parent to experience. But as a parent you still need to try and get past that hatred being thrown at you and keep your role strong as the parent as well as keeping your integrity, your values and your own self worth.

One thing you can do when you are feeling the overwhelming stress of a child that shows no respect and is hateful is breathe. Take some time for yourself and go to your room and just breathe. This is especially true if there is an argument brewing. Simply leave the argument and go to your room, let your teen keep ranting and arguing alone. Taking this time for yourself might send a message and calm your teen down.

It's hard but try to ignore the horrible outbursts when it's possible. Trying to get involved in an argument is only going to encourage your teen to simply keep acting in the disrespectful manner he's engaging in. If you yell back at him when he cusses you out and yells out how much he hates you you are letting him win and you are in his comfort zone and that's what he wants. Restate your position in a calm manner and walk out of the room if he continues to push your buttons. You don't have to take the abuse and that's what it is.

Go to your room and scream or yell into a pillow if you have to. Beat the pillow whatever it takes, get it out of your system, you need to release the hurt and the anger. It's not easy to feel hated by your own child.

Call a friend or another parent. Get in touch with your own mother or your pastor. You need to talk and let your feelings out. You need to be able to talk things through so that it will help you to start thinking more clearly as well. Whatever you do, don't start blaming yourself for the way your child is treating you. More times than not the behavior of your teen has absolutely nothing to do with your personal parenting skills it has more to do with your teen period and not what you personally have done.

Most importantly in order for you to feel less stressed out and in more control you need to assert yourself as the parent. No matter what your teen says or does or tries to do. You must be firm when it comes to your decisions and this must include your rules and the consequences for breaking those same rules. If this means you will be taking his allowance away, or you are taking his car keys away, or his cell phone, the home phone privileges, computer use or going out with friends. Do it! You must. Understand this, legally you are only required to provide your child with a safe home, clothing and food. That's it. So be firm and don't back down. Sure being firm is a hard thing to do especially when they are being so hateful towards you, but it must be done. You must stand your ground so you know that when you go to bed that you have done everything in your power to protect your teen against himself.


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6 Steps to Recover from PTSD Flashbacks

PTSD flashbacks are life-disrupting psychological events that make it difficult to function normally in your daily life. Learning to avoid these upsetting events is the first thing that every person with PTSD wants to do. The following steps will help guide you on the way to recovering from your PTSD flashbacks.
  • Resume Normal Life – After a traumatic experience, or the intense reliving of a traumatic experience, you should make the attempt to return to your normal life as soon as possible. If you persist in shutting yourself away from the world, you will not have a chance to inure yourself to the triggers found in everyday life that might otherwise become harmless and mundane once again.
  • Learn Coping Behaviors – Coping behaviors are how you can enable yourself to encounter triggers in everyday life without re-traumatizing yourself. In order to build up an “immunity” to the triggers for your flashbacks, you will need to put some effort into finding and creating coping mechanisms that work for you. These may involve calming breathing routines, visualization exercises, or personal mantras that acknowledge your fear and remind you that you are safe and in the present.
  • Talk to Other Survivors of Trauma – If you are someone with PTSD, you may feel that no-one understands what you have been through, or feel ashamed that your experiences have affected you to this degree. It may help to demonstrate to yourself that you are not alone by talking with other trauma survivors who are undergoing their own versions of what you are going through. Being able to speak frankly about your experiences to someone who truly understands can be a highly therapeutic experience and make you less anxious about the flashbacks themselves.
  • Empower Yourself – Focusing on being the victim of your traumatic experience and the powerlessness that the experience and the flashbacks make you feel does nothing to strengthen you against them. Taking some action in response to your trauma, such as donating to/volunteering for a cause or writing about it in a journal, can help you to find closure and give your mind the sense that it is in control again.
  • Consider How You’ve Changed – It’s easy to concentrate on the bad repercussions of trauma, but there can be good ones, too. Perhaps you have come out of the experience stronger as a person, or have discovered what really matters to you in life, or made you aware of social problems you never thought about before. How you look at a situation and how you behave when faced with it can make a big difference in how positive or negative its effects will be. In the case of PTSD, it will help you to stop focusing on your flashback anxiety and start appreciating your mind’s overall resilience and power, instead.
  • Have Patience – Being patient when it comes to PTSD flashbacks can be a challenge. You just want them to finally go away for good. However, if you push yourself too hard, give yourself a hard time about your attacks, and don’t put enough effort into helping yourself, you will actually end up increasing the severity and frequency of the panic attacks rather than decreasing them.

    PTSD flashbacks can’t be instantly “cured” in the blink of an eye. They require time and effort to overcome. However, as a survivor of trauma, you can take courage in knowing that you have the strength to survive most any psychological challenge that comes your way.


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Stress & Anxiety Resources - How to Cope With the Stress of Elderly Parents Moving In With You

There could be a time that you will have to make the decision to let your elderly parents or even in-laws come and live with you. There could be a variety of reasons for this decision but what matters is that you are able to make it a good arrangement for everyone involved and that it doesn't become a burden on anyone. This can be very stressful for all parties so it's a good idea to do your best to try and lower those stress levels.

The first thing that you need to do is to make sure that you discuss the whole situation well in advance of them moving into your home. You need to realize that your parents are use to being able to live independently in their own place and this could be as hard for them to adjust to as yourself.

You should talk about all the different issues that you think might come up before they try to get settled in and try to create an atmosphere of mutual trust and respect and try to come to any compromises ahead of time that is going to work for everyone who lives in the home together.

Even though they may be your parents, it's still your home and with as much tact as you can manage to muster up, you do need to establish what your particular house rules are. Each person needs to agree to having their own responsibilities as well as their own limitations within your home. It's important to note to everyone in the family that everyone does have their own identity and that bringing in elderly parents and adding this to the formula that already exists can disrupt the harmony of the family for a short while. So be prepared for that and make sure that your family is as well.

If you still have children living at home, you need to consider them as well. Even though the kids may love their grandparents dearly it still can be kind of a hard adjustment for your kids especially if they are teens. So it's important that some boundaries are set and make sure they are boundaries that everyone can agree to live with. You children also need to be aware that they need to be considerate to their grandparents and the grandparents also need to understand they need to step back while you dish out the discipline when it's needed.

Everyone needs and deserves their own privacy so make sure that is something that everyone is assured of. Make sure that your parents room has everything they might need so that they will feel as self sufficient as they can. This might mean putting in a small refrigerator and a microwave for times when maybe they just want to be alone and eat in their room with one another. Anything to make them feel like they have their own space.

Your parents are use to having their own furniture and things for years and years, but it's obvious you are not going to be able to let them bring all of their own things with them. However, you might be able to rearrange things where they can add some of their things, especially in their own room. Other things will need to be sold, stored away or given to other relatives.

You should discuss a budget to see if your parents are going to pitch in on the expenses or are they just going to cover their own and you will need to cover everything else. Whatever you do, don't assume anything when it comes to the finances. You definitely need to discuss this before they move in.

If your parents are physically able to help around the house and they show interest in doing so, then let them. This will help them like they are worth something and that they are still useful. This can be a very difficult and emotional time for them and the last thing you want is for them to feel worthless.

Final Note: Be encouraging and try to convince them to stay independent and active this will be a big help for their emotional health. Patience, very key here. You need to have patience for any of this to work. It may take awhile to adjust, but with patience, it will be easier.
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Stress & Anxiety Resources - How to Cope With the Stress of Elderly Parents Moving In With You

There could be a time that you will have to make the decision to let your elderly parents or even in-laws come and live with you. There could be a variety of reasons for this decision but what matters is that you are able to make it a good arrangement for everyone involved and that it doesn't become a burden on anyone. This can be very stressful for all parties so it's a good idea to do your best to try and lower those stress levels.

The first thing that you need to do is to make sure that you discuss the whole situation well in advance of them moving into your home. You need to realize that your parents are use to being able to live independently in their own place and this could be as hard for them to adjust to as yourself.

You should talk about all the different issues that you think might come up before they try to get settled in and try to create an atmosphere of mutual trust and respect and try to come to any compromises ahead of time that is going to work for everyone who lives in the home together.

Even though they may be your parents, it's still your home and with as much tact as you can manage to muster up, you do need to establish what your particular house rules are. Each person needs to agree to having their own responsibilities as well as their own limitations within your home. It's important to note to everyone in the family that everyone does have their own identity and that bringing in elderly parents and adding this to the formula that already exists can disrupt the harmony of the family for a short while. So be prepared for that and make sure that your family is as well.

If you still have children living at home, you need to consider them as well. Even though the kids may love their grandparents dearly it still can be kind of a hard adjustment for your kids especially if they are teens. So it's important that some boundaries are set and make sure they are boundaries that everyone can agree to live with. You children also need to be aware that they need to be considerate to their grandparents and the grandparents also need to understand they need to step back while you dish out the discipline when it's needed.

Everyone needs and deserves their own privacy so make sure that is something that everyone is assured of. Make sure that your parents room has everything they might need so that they will feel as self sufficient as they can. This might mean putting in a small refrigerator and a microwave for times when maybe they just want to be alone and eat in their room with one another. Anything to make them feel like they have their own space.

Your parents are use to having their own furniture and things for years and years, but it's obvious you are not going to be able to let them bring all of their own things with them. However, you might be able to rearrange things where they can add some of their things, especially in their own room. Other things will need to be sold, stored away or given to other relatives.

You should discuss a budget to see if your parents are going to pitch in on the expenses or are they just going to cover their own and you will need to cover everything else. Whatever you do, don't assume anything when it comes to the finances. You definitely need to discuss this before they move in.

If your parents are physically able to help around the house and they show interest in doing so, then let them. This will help them like they are worth something and that they are still useful. This can be a very difficult and emotional time for them and the last thing you want is for them to feel worthless.

Final Note: Be encouraging and try to convince them to stay independent and active this will be a big help for their emotional health. Patience, very key here. You need to have patience for any of this to work. It may take awhile to adjust, but with patience, it will be easier.
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Did You Know That Stress and Depression Can be Controlled With How We Think!

It is not surprising that there is an increase in depression in the United States. With the state the economy is in and the different personal losses many may be experiencing with loss of jobs, the different natural disasters where there has been loss, the war, you name it. This kind of stress no doubt is a large part of the equation and why there is so much depression being spread around.

Remember that depression can be caused from different things such as :
  • Being hereditary
  • Past and present abuse
  • Illnesses
  • Chronic pain,
  • Medications
  • Death
  • Divorce
  • Moving
  • Job loss
And much much more. All of these things are also considered stressors and it is important that we learn to deal with the stressful situations that we face on a daily basis. It is important to note that even if there is no chance that we can actually change the situation, that's not what is important. What is important here is that we find a way in which we change the way we deal with the situations. If we learn to deal differently with the stressful situations we are going to be able to keep ourselves a lot healthier.

So the most important thing we can do is to figure out how to control our way of thinking. We need to be able to know how to control how we feel and this will in turn help us control how we react to those feeling. We need to be able to know how to act and not let ourselves re-act to stressful situations.

There are classes that a person can take or counseling a person can look for that will help them to alter the way that they perceive things in life. With a little research you can find a place that might be best for you and your issues. You might want to find somewhere you can go that you can receive support from people who are experiencing or have experienced the same thing.

If you don't want something like that you can try and help yourself by doing a few things that might help to calm you down when times seem to be too tough to handle. Some of those things are:
  • Deep breathing. Take take out to take a few deep breaths. It does help. By breathing deeply, you and your body does not have the opportunity to re-act and the extra oxygen will help sooth you internally.
  • Take a walk or a jog. By doing this, you are helping your body to cope with the stress by producing adrenaline in a positive manner. It also will remove you from the situation that is causing the stress.
  • Pray or meditate. Praying or meditation has a way of altering the way you think and feel and is an extremely effective way to calm the entire body down. It not only removes you from the situation since both require an area where it should be calm and no distractions. It also is a way for you to get more in tune with yourself and your spiritual self.

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Stress Management - How Certain Foods Can Help You Reduce Stress!

If you are under a lot of stress there are a lot of things that the stress can do to your mind and body. One in particular is to raise your blood pressure to an unhealthy manner. It can interfere with your sleep patterns, raise blood sugar levels and mess with your immune system. Believe it or not, there are some foods that you can eat that will actually help you fight stress. Below are some great foods that help to reduce stress when eaten.

If you love walnuts then keep them on hand because they contain omega-3 fatty acids, copper, manganese as well as tryptophan. All of these ingredients in the walnut has the power to lower your blood pressure as well as protect your heart. Walnuts will also help to improve the function of your brain and they also help to improve you immune system. They are also good as an anti-inflammatory and can help to relieve asthma, eczema as well as arthritis. Tryptophan also helps to relax a person and makes it easier to get a good night sleep.

Love chocolate? You're going to love it even more. As delicious as it is it also contains what is called flavonoids and flavonoids will help to relax you. The phenethylene will also help improve the mood that you are in. You don't need to have much chocolate in order to reap the benefits of these two ingredients. Because chocolate is high in fat and calories so it's a good idea to limit how much you eat.

Oatmeal is another good food for stress. Oatmeal is known to stimulate the production the natural mood elevator called serotonin. It will also help to satisfy our body's craving for the carbohydrates that it needs. It is extremely high in fiber so oatmeal is going to fill you up more than a lot of other foods.

You know the old commercial “Milk does a body good.” Well, it does. Milk is just loaded with calcium and it also is one of the best natural tranquilizers. One glass of milk drank at bedtime will relax a person enough to be able to relax and fall asleep. Milk will lessen muscle cramps as well and even migraine headaches. Other good benefits found from drinking milk is that it will improve a person's nerve and muscle functions and as well know is great for our bones and teeth. Milk also is believed to be able to actually protect against certain cancers.

Another thing you should think about is the amount of potassium your body gets. In order to get good amounts of potassium to help with stress is through certain vegetables and fruits. Some of those would be broccoli, spinach, carrots and sweet potatoes. Fruits that lower stress and have potassium are bananas, apples, oranges and strawberries.
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Understanding Distress as a Major Form of Stress in Our Lives

Life is always going to be filled with a lot of different joys and a lot of different kinds of things that cause us distress or stress. The daily pressures that face us from our different relationships within the family and outside of the family like with friends or the boss or even those you work with. Finances as well as other things like the loss of a job, a loved one, having to move, all of these things are stressors and when the stress turns into distress it makes our ability to handle anxiety a lot harder.

It's a known fact that there are both negative and positive stressors that will affect the way a person is able to cope with the stress levels in their life. Some of the negative things that affect our abilities to cope would be the death of a spouse or loved one, divorce, getting fired are just some big ones to mention. But even some of the positive things can also cause stress as well like planning for a wedding, the birth of a child, moving to a new and better place, even getting a promotion.

Distress as well as anxiety is going to reveal themselves in different ways with different people and there can be a vast variety of mental issues that can stem from this anxiety. For example PTSD or post traumatic disorder can happen if the person re-experiences that traumatic event or if they are trying to avoid experiencing it again. Some people may become agoraphobic when they suddenly fear going somewhere they feel might threaten them due to the stress they are experiencing.

Sometimes it can be quite hard to figure out the effects of the stress and when it is going to overload a person's ability to be able to cope and use their coping mechanisms. It is suggested that a person learn how to examine their bodies and their feelings a long with how they behave under stress so that they can begin to identify the things that are making them feel this way. For instance a person might want to take note when they get hear palpitations, or when they feel muscle tension, have indigestion. These are sometimes clear warnings that you are under too much stress. It's then to note what you were doing or experiencing prior to these things happening. This will then help a person to pinpoint what the triggers might be.

In order to cope better with stress a person needs to adapt habits that will assist them against the stressors. A person needs to be able to set limits in their life and know when they need to stop and do something that will help relax them. This could be saying no to a boss when they ask a person to take on extra work or if it's saying no to someone else in your life who needs you to do something and you are already feeling overworked or over extended.

You can also help to combat stress by making sure that you have a diet that has all of the nutrients that you need to maintain good overall physical and mental balance. Exercise, like taking a walk or just doing stretching exercises can do wonders when it comes to a point when a person feels stress overtaking them.

Other good things to do to help cut down and fight stress would be getting in touch with your spiritual side, pray, meditate, listen to music that comforts you, write your feelings in a journal or even just getting out alone and communing with nature. All of these things seem to be able to calm a person down and help them to cope better with the stress in their lives.

Remember if stress leads to distress and starts to cause you to be impaired where it affects the quality of your life, it is time to seek professional help. The treatment you might receive could be a combination of therapy as well as some short term to long term medications that might help to get rid of your anxiety.
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